I see it time and time again, I read what appears to be an entertaining, witty, and REAL article about motherhood. An article that touches my soul, either through laughter or tears or camaraderie – something that makes me think outside of my personal every day life. I go to comment, and there it is – comment number ONE (or if you are lucky, number two).
A hate comment.
But the thing is…
They don’t exist.
Except in our imaginations, where unicorns and perfect Moms are very, VERY real.
But these comments. I am always baffled by this. Who are these people??! The ones who think they can leave comments that hurt and anguish the author. The ones who think they are just so perfect, that they have oodles of knowledge to teach and shame the rest of us with. I have certainly had my fair share of hurtful comments, and luckily when it is on my own blog I can put them where they belong – the trash bin. But when I write an article for a larger website, there they sit. Festering in top pole position. People either defend the author or gang up, and it causes a great debate.
This happens on every. single. parenting. article. By every single author who is brave enough to write about it. Even the ones you finish reading and think are hilarious or heart warming. Somebody has an opinion otherwise. It is inevitable.
When did we decide we were the end-all-know-all in parenting? Was it after one too many episodes of Supernanny? And when did we lose empathy for our fellow man? That through the great unknown interwebs void, we forgot there was a fellow human being standing on the opposite end of that computer reading these hateful words. A real live person is reading that comment.
But here is the thing. Perfect Moms don’t exist.
(Unless you count my Mom, who was indeed perfect). But for the rest of us, we are simply doing the best we can on a day to day basis…
Perfect Moms are Like Unicorns.
Perfect Moms and Like Unicorns, artwork by: Tara Faul, Girl Like the Sea
So the next time a ‘perfect Mom’ who would neeeever do that to their baby pipes up. Just remember. Her poop stinks too.
And while little Jimmy may neeeever eat processed foods, guess what – little Jimmy probably just hit your kid while playing in the sandbox. We are all just regular Moms, doing the best for the people we love most in the world. Our family.
Let’s be in this thing called LIFE together.
Love this post…you know, you’re a mom. Designed imperfectly to take perfectly good care of your child. <3 #firsttimemom
BRAVO! Thank you for saying exactly what I’m thinking every time I read the comments section of a parenting article!
Love it! Perfect moms do not exist! Fortunately, children are resilient. And those mom who make negative comments, their kids are trading their carrot sticks for some other kid’s twinkles!
THANK YOU! Beautifully said. We all need to lift each other up more often.
Because I have 7 kids, I know a lot about raising kids. But BECAUSE I have 7 kids, I probably know better than anyone the level of my inadequacy, and never comment or give advice unless asked. And IF I do share something when asked, I usually try to do it by email; sparing MYSELF the shame of looking like a know-it-all. Because the only thing I really TRULY know is that no parent is perfect..and I’m at the top of that list!
Amen, sister!
There are so many trolls who need to read this post RIGHT NOW! Well said, Jess!!
Beautifully written, beautifully true words of wisdom! You are a beautifully imperfect parent–the best kind! Just like all of God’s creations. Perfection is a man-made, unrealistic, inhuman illusion. To be perfect means to lose your creativity–to be a robot. Be who you are and be proud of who you are–lovely flaws and all! Because those “flaws” are what make us most beautiful!
Sadly, this is true of *any* item on the web, not just parenting articles. (What ever happened to keeping a thought to yourself?) Heck, I’m not even an expert on parenting MY kid, let alone someone else’s! : )